FACTORS THAT MAKE YOUR "IN-LAWS TO BE" DIFFICULT TO DEAL WITH - Welcome to Lumenar's blog

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Sunday, 5 July 2020

FACTORS THAT MAKE YOUR "IN-LAWS TO BE" DIFFICULT TO DEAL WITH




Chinecherem Ubaka

As a young lady in a relationship willing to take the bold step with your partner, you might want to check out the nature of the family you are about to get into alongside the personality traits of your partner's family members. Nevertheless, there are some factors that might make it difficult for you to relate with them. 

Social Class: If your in-laws to be are on a higher social-economic pedestal, they might be difficult to deal with. This is because you might be termed as a "gold-digger" which is quite sad. Sometimes, these set of individuals prefer their sons to get married to women whose families are on the same social-economic pedestal. Those who can bring fame, investments and connection. So naturally, if you don't meet this standard, relating with your in-laws to be might be an herculean task.

Family Traditions and Cultures: Your partner's family traditions and culture might be a shock to you. For instance, if it's a family where the youngest wife serves the senior wives in the family; you will left with two choices; to blend in or to get out. 

Your Personality: If your personality is toxic in nature, you will obviously find it difficult to relate with your in-laws to be. If you have a false nature or you live a fake life, you might enter the bad books of your would be in-laws.

Religion: If you do not belong to their religious group, there might be problem. For instance, if his family is a Methodist and you attend the Elevation Church, it is naturally expected that you would join them in Methodist Church. If you refuse, they will start looking at you one kind.

Your Career: Some in-laws will insist that you quit you career for a "time-being" in other to learn how to be a wife and mother. If you have a good paying job, they might force you to quit. The moment you resist, the relationship between you and them becomes sour. 


SO WHAT SHOULD YOU DO?
1. Earn their respect by getting them to respect  you. Do not dim your light or withdraw into your shell in other to satisfy their terms. 
2. Be assertive. This does not give you licence to be rude. When you are not comfortable with something...say it. Don't suffer in silence.
3. Have a good support system. You need them baby gurl. Sometimes, you just need to hear your convictions from a third party before you can act on them.
4. You self try. Have basic ettiquettes. Have a moral standing. Be responsible. You don't expect your would be in laws to accept a lousy  and mannerless woman into their family.
5. Comport yourself properly and dress nicely. Don't look shabby. Even if you don't have the billion dollars yet, you can still dress elegantly without breaking the bank.

2 comments:

  1. Nice tips dear, number 1 & 2 was especially helpful for me. Thanks so much

    ReplyDelete