Monday, 11 May 2020


You are in a relationship however you are lonely! This is ironical. As ironical as it may be, this is the situation in most relationships. Why do you you feel lonely even as you are in a committed relationship?
a. You are not communicating well
As much as we expect the other party to apply initiative and be sensitive, it is not fair on them as well especially as they are not mind readers. Speak! talk things out. Where you do not get a favourable reply, follow your heart and intuition.

b. Your likes do not allign with your partner's likes
There is joy when you do things together with your loved ones. This is impossible when your individual preferences are different and neither of you is willing to compromise. For instance, if one person derives pleasure in watching "zee world" while the other hates it with passion, you are left with the option of watching it alone or not watching anything at all so as to please the other party. You find that there is nothing between the both of you that bonds you together. You can fix things by trying to like your partner's likes and cajoling him/her to like yours too as well as being creative.

c. You do things without carrying your partner along
Probably you are a spontaneous person. You decide to do something and boom you set about carrying out the task. In the process, you are stuck and you need help. The other person has no idea about what you are up to and besides he or she might have his or plans as well. It's natural to receive hurtful replies like "leave me alone" "fix it" or "you are doing good already" or "you probably didn't think you need me, so why now?" Try to ensure that you and your partner agree before you take certain decisions or carry out certain acts.

d. No time to gist
Gisting is very important in relationships. I mean how do you sustain a relationship without gists, conversations and discussions. Sometimes, it's disheartening when you attempt to share your experiences with your partner and you get solo replies like "okay" or "Nice" or "I am trying to do something, can we talk later?" or "am a busy right now" or "please, please am not in the mood" or worse still "you are talking too much, am trying to think here". Gosh, it is painful especially when you feel like talking to someone at that moment. The natural thing is that you seek for emotional satisfaction outside i.e. from someone else. The forgoing brings a strain on the relationship between you and your partner which might be irreparable if left remedy. It all boils down to effective and clear communication. Try to listen to your partner and be sensitive too. You never know, he or she might be dealing with issues you have no idea about.

e. Your Partner has lost interest: This is quite sad especially when he or she refuses to be direct with the fact his/her interest in the you is dwindling or gone. They exhibit actions that can be heart rendering. Table the issues you have with your partner in clear terms and spice up your relationship.

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